Flip a Coin Instead

One “unmarried” male reader asked me what my thoughts were about sex. Immediately the bipolarity of highs and lows made me think that perhaps this was the ultimate satisfaction he can get in keeping his relationship on the go. Spank me for thinking rude.

So what do I think of sex?

Here it goes.

I think the sexual revolution promised sex free of commitment and responsibilities, promiscuity without judgement, and intercourse without conception (the birth control pill with an abortion chaser) – just self-centered pleasure seeking.

I also think that the feminist movement taught us (both men and women) that this was all a good thing. “When women are freed from the shackles of morality, modesty, and marriage, then orgasms would be more frequent and more explosive.” Do you think I would really believe that? What actually happened was the loss of courtship, romance, chivalry, falling in love, commitment, and marriage. It does not appear that most women are particularly happy. The price for this liberation was so profound and personally devastating.

Sex has become a kind of sport for both men and women. Where once, a pregnancy precipitated assuming responsibilities, today men easily walk away as women are left with their freedom of abortions and unmarried parenthood. It is ironic that there is still such an emphasis on criticizing deadbeat dads for walking away, when an aborting mother is not seen as a deadbeat mom, though her decision actually brings death upon the scene. Sheesh! What’s the big deal about deadbeat dads when women can get sperm from a bank or an unsuspecting sexual partner and, like many movie TV celebrities, just be a “single mom” with no criticism? Sounds like women are speaking out of two sides of their mouths like two sides of a coin.

And what about “safe” sex?

There isn’t any.

The epitome of intimacy, the union of men and women in pleasure and procreation is anything but safe because it is a leap of trust. Forget the STDs, abortions, and the unfortunate illegitimate children, and think of the repetitive hurts of “serial monogamy” and the ultimate loneliness and emptiness that follow sex without context.

What do YOU think about sex?

Everybody is Free to Wear Sunscreen

One of the tough realities a growing child has to face as he/she matures is that they are not the center of the universe. It’s easy for a small child to feel that he or she is the center of the universe when every gurgle and scribble is oohed and ahhed about by parents and relatives. The first time that their kindergarten teacher tells them they can’t take that crayon away from Mary, or that Johnny gets to go first, or that their drawing needs work, children recognize that life is a cooperative effort.

Some don’t give up being the center of the universe easily, and getting attention and becoming the focus of others takes on many forms – some healthy, some not. It’s all a matter of degree and balance. Some become entertaining, or even entertainers. Some become “needed,” some become utterly dependent, some become perpetually ill, and so forth.

All in all, the “I must be in the spotlight” mentality generally brings darkness to the family.

It is important to watch that ego! The ego-trap is an easy one for people to fall into. Being good at something makes one feel important – that too often leads to a sense of entitlement – that moves right into a sense of superiority – and that collapses relationships.

So, is everybody free to wear sunscreen?

You bet!

Yana, thanks for showing this video to me. Now I think it is too late for me to use sunscreen. Besides, I'm allergic to it. Poor me.

My Independence Day

This is another year where millions of Americans right now are enjoying the word “freedom”. But are we really free? Free from what bondage? I would like to personalize this day to be my day of independence instead. I think it will be more appropriate and meaningful, at least for me. Today, very early in the morning, I was given the opportunity to ask forgiveness from an individual I hurt so bad. I hurt this wonderful person with lies, not just small lies, but “life-changing-lies”. Yes, that opportunity was not something I even imagined would come, but I took advantage of the situation, and blurted, “Please forgive me.” I did not get a response yet. I was not expecting to be forgiven right away. However, I felt relieved by just saying those words. It felt wonderful to be righteous, and truthful. Just being free from the bondage of lies. You gotta be kidding me, it was awesome! I am not sure how enormous the damage was though, or how repairable it will be, but deep inside of me feels that I was already forgiven. Forgiveness, perhaps not from this person, but from God, and myself. With this thought, I look back at the cross where my beloved Jesus suffered. Yes, I remembered, He suffered for me, and for all those who lied, and even those who are still covered with a life of lies. Now, I take part of this freedom today. Completely healed. No to "bondage". No longer a captive of untruthfulness, but a survivor of the Truth. As long as my Beloved is in my heart, I shall overcome lies. “Truth shall set you free.”